Pinterest, the love/hate relationship

I know I've ranted about Pinterest before, but it was mostly about my addiction to it. In the past few months I've developed a serious love/hate relationship with Pinterest. I can't break up with it obviously because of the love portion of my relationship. Here's how pinterest is doing me wrong...

1. There are so many great ideas on there, that I want to try them all but I have a full time job, 3 kids, a husband who is like a overgrown 4th kid, and a very limited bank account to go with my very limited amount of my free time.

2. There are so many ideas on there that I either get overwhelmed and forget where I pinned things I wanted to try or I get distracted and find more things I want to try, never actually getting any of them done.

3. Most of the ideas on there that I truly love are not cooking (which I do acceptably at best) but home improvement projects that require that I obtain skills such as the ability to work with power tools, or simply knowing how to use the sewing machine I purchased on a whim 12 years ago and still can't sew a straight line with.

4. I am not handy (in case you haven't guessed that) and I am also not well versed in crafty, and to top it off I don't have neat things like Michael's or any other craft store within 30 miles of my house. Which means for the few things I have tried I have used "substitute" materials which have resulted in pintrocities, and in no way shape or form resemble the craft I intended them to be. It's very discouraging.

So you see my dilemma right? Oh Pinterest why do you mock me....

Time randomness

I was having a rather long conversation with one of my oldest friends today and I caught myself during the conversation thinking about dates in terms of before kids, after the first was born., before/after my middle was born, before/after the youngest was born , and I realized that is how I remember anything. Is it sad that the only means of remembering a timeline is based on the birth of my children? Probably but it's the best most accurate method I've got.

Eating Sh..

Do you ever get tired of eating sh*t? I know I do. Being a grown up sucks major arse, taking the high road instead of blatantly speaking your mind. I don't know if this being mature thing is really all it's cracked up to be. I know I have control issues, but a lot of those control issues are also common sense issues, and it really seems to be lacking today.

Professionalism on the work front is not all it's cracked up to be, it requires you to hold your tongue, stay neutral and not get ahead of yourself when really you see the big f-ing problems as clear as day and can see the solution potentials to those problems but it's well above your pay grade/ position to even be listened to let alone accepted. BLOWS, eating that kind of sh*t because really your only go is to see things improved and maybe by proxy improve your own situation as well.

What I want to say is....

• Hey, what you are doing is clearly not working because your overlooking the big ass elephant in the room and it's about as useful putting a band aid on a missing limb.
• Hello?!! A little stepping outside of the box and not being terrified of the big bad world around you and might be a good idea. Hey and maybe, I don't know stepping into the current times technologically could benefit you, it's not 1988 anymore!
• Um, imagine that for one second you treated the employee's as individuals instead of avoiding having to actually confront the douche canoes causing problems and laying blanket, antiquated, and stupid ass rules across the board.(did i mention its bad for employee morale)
• OMG! Here's a thought!! How about you actually look into something that's been suggested on your own or have your assistants do that for you rather than immediately taking the word of someone who is completely guilty of being terrified by anything new.

Alas, I am a professional and voiced my opinions in the (mostly) appropriate settings to the (mostly) appropriate people. Meanwhile what I see makes my smh repeatedly and actually question my own sanity. I don't understand why such asinine shit must take place in the workplace and really have to work to keep myself if check. 

That's rant enough for now before I say something that may be used against me. In the meantime, I will be thankful for the baby steps because without those I'd lose my damn mind.

New Year Resolutions

This year I resolve to not make resolutions I cannot possibly live up to in a realistically.  Clearly I cannot resolve to become financially free of all debt in just 12 months; there are other things at work there. I can however resolve that I will work harder at saving, cut unnecessary spending, and live more frugally.  The likelihood that I will end all of my bad habits are about as likely that I will hit the lotto tomorrow, so this year I will refrain from resolving to do so. 

I am resolving this year to recognize when to be more humble and just as importantly to acknowledge myself when I should. I will work on not dismissing myself or my efforts as “no problem” when in fact they are but I will also not assume that I am more important than I am, in essence I am going to seek balance. I am also going to work on thinking more deeply before I speak, as I have a habit of sticking my foot in my mouth. I am rather opinionated and have been known to make snap judgments only to later discover that I may have not had all the pertinent information at hand.

 I am as most of us are a work in progress, so rather than claiming I will become this completely transformed person this year, I will work on just being a slightly better version on myself now. I do however resolve to find more happiness in each and every day. I resolve to play more with my children as they are growing fast and soon they will not desire my attention. I resolve to look at my husband frequently, I mean really look at him, see the man I love and hope that he truly sees me in return.  These are resolutions I truly hope I can live up to in the year 2013. 

Let me also add to that~ I will work on putting value into things that are worthy, and in doing so not waste my time on the things that bring no value to my family, life, or happiness.

Christmas countdown pressure

Can you feel the pressure?

I like list, I like to give the illusion that I am organized, a gifted multi-tasker, that I can handle anything. This year I am failing!!! I cannot believe that it’s December 1^st this is the most unprepared I’ve been for Christmas EVER! I am not even close to being ready for my kids to rip open gifts in just 24 short f-ing days. I certainly haven’t bought or taken our annual Christmas picture to display how much the kids have grown. I usually take this pretty seriously especially since I certainly don’t develop, print, buy or whatever many pictures of the kids throughout the year, this is the BIG one, the one that tells all the family both distant and close, “look hey, I kept the kids alive, they look good and hell they are even growing up”. 

I think what has me the most stressed out is that I had a master plan for Christmas this year. I had decided this was going to be a Christmas that they would actually appreciate more after the day itself more so than tearing open packages they would soon forget about anyway. Sadly my master plan required a lot of preparation on my part, and as the days quickly pass, my progress gets nowhere the stress of it all builds and BAM! I am still struggling because now I’m acknowledging the stress, it’s a vicious cycle. 

Seriously my kids ask for very little, legos, a video game or two, some dvds, and other random odds and ends. I mean in the grand scheme of things they didn’t ask for much. My master plan involved fixing up their TV room, a new TV, stand, and a blue-ray player, a futon to replace the 1970’s gold-ish couch that eats everything that gets near it and some shelves for storage and organization since I’ll be discarding the giant and ancient entertainment center that serves as a storage area for clutter, trash and dust currently. Fine, I’ll admit it; once I put it into writing I see the “master plan” was more for me than for them. Less clutter means less cleaning for me. The creation of their TV room was for me too, less cartoons I am forced to sit through, and not having to watch them play the Wii was nice too. Maybe if I spent less time on Pinterest I would have time to get it all done….

Pinteresterrific

Pinteresterrific

They say the first step is admitting you have a problem, fine I’ll admit it. I have a problem. I’m addicted to Pinterest, when I am home I check it frequently. I don’t always repin the things I see but I do look at it more frequently than I do my email, facebook, way more than twitter (I often forget I even have an account).

I have tried to justify my addiction to myself by telling myself that there is useful information on Pinterest, crafts, recipes, ideas that I will eventually need to know. Deep down I know the truth, I am nowhere near motivated enough, nor do I have enough free time (because I use all of it on Pinterest) to actually accomplish any of these “project ideas”.  There is some truth to my justification there really is useful information on Pinterest and really it is far more interesting than facebook. 

I knew however that I had a real problem when my loving husband decided he now wanted a Pinterest account. I had now spent enough time on Pinterest and discussed it so much with him that he took notice, found an interest in Pinterest, and my heart jumped a little beat because now he and I could share the Pinterest love. That little spark of excitement in my heart was a wakeup call, or at least the thing I needed to recognize the fact that it has become an addiction. All I’m promising is to recognize the problem, I have no intention of giving it up. After all, it is really full of useful information.

Holiday Spirit?

Christmas has officially thrown up in my house as much as it ever does. We are not the overachieving family; we don’t even put up any lights outside. I reserve our decorating to a small confined area of the house that takes about ½ the time to take down as it did to put up. I do follow the tradition of putting up the tree the day after Thanksgiving and in that time I like to have holiday music going in the background and it is ever so much more happy if the weather outside is below 80 degrees (pretty nice for Florida). 

This year it was like pulling teeth to get the kids involved. The teenager did her duty with dignity and the right amount of kissing mom’s butt to appease her. The boy and the little one were not remotely interested in getting the tree up. Internally I was thinking “whoa” is this the sign that my young ones have stopped believing? Has the magic of Christmas left my home? I’m not ready for that reality! I mean I’ve joked about it for years but now that I’m on the cusp of this thing, this non-magical, no longer being able to frightened them in to good behavior by the mere mention of Santa’s name, no longer able to look at their innocent little faces and see the twinkle of Christmas in their eyes (okay maybe I’m exaggerating here), the love of Christmas will be reduced to “here mom, here’s my list”. 

I mean seriously what is wrong with this picture “the teenager” appeased me but not my 11 and 8 year old!?! Is this the twilight zone? I think at this point I’m the bigger kid than they are. I love the old movies and cannot wait to watch White Christmas and It’s a wonderful life. It’s pretty bad when my loving husband can see the look on my face, take pity on me and leaves the Christmas music on for a full 30 minutes after walking in the door just in an attempt to make me happy. 

In my head we should be some damn corny movie from back in the day. I want the whole shebang and I don’t think I should have to settle. I want the house that looks like a damn magazine spread, with the music playing in the background and the roaring fire, the dancing in our living room for no other reason than that we are so taken up by the feeling of the season it overwhelms our desire to do anything else. Is that too much to ask? Really? Okay I’m delusional, but it makes me smile so it’s harmless enough.